Merrill One time, I was at this party……

Merrill One time, I was at this party… and I was sitting on the couch with Amanda McKinney. She was just sitting there, looking beautiful. So, I lean in to kiss her, and I realize I have gum in my mouth. So, I turn to spit it out and put it in a paper cup. I turn back, and Amanda McKinney throws up all over herself. I knew the moment it happened, it was a miracle. I could have been kissing her when she threw up. It would have scarred me for life. I may never have recovered.

Quote, saying and phrase by: Signs

Michael Bolton Yeah, well at least your …

Michael Bolton Yeah, well at least your name isn’t Michael Bolton. Samir You know there’s nothing wrong with that name. Michael Bolton There was nothing wrong with it… until I was about 12 years old and that no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys.

Quote, saying and phrase by: Office Space

Merrill Morgan, this crop stuff is just …

Merrill Morgan, this crop stuff is just about a bunch of nerds who never had a girlfriend their whole lives. They’re like thirty now. They make up secret codes and analyze Greek mythology and make secret societies where other guys who never had girlfriends can join in. They do stupid crap like this to feel special. It’s a scam. Nerds were doin’ it twenty five years ago and new nerds are doing it again.

Quote, saying and phrase by: Signs